Hang in there and cut yourself some slack.
At least you are writing. No matter how big is the audience, putting yourself out there, it takes courage.
Being an immigrant, black, etc. Are not excuses. But as you find your voice, you also find the challenge of connecting to others. Or at least is how I feel, in a kind of similar situation as yours with ten years more in this world.
Lastly, I don’t think it’s a minor detail your wife is doing her residency. I don’t think it’s a minor detail you followed her halfway around the world, and now she spends many hours away working.
Hang in there. Spring is around the corner. And then the sun will touch us, and we’ll produce fruit.