As I was reading I was thinking that especially when you are young, if you are raised within a monogamous (I will abstain from adding patriarchal) relationship framework, you just don’t think about “there are other people we may want to relate other than this great human being I am relating to”.

And when we are young, and at least for me, when someone was willing to open up and listen, I somehow became blinded. I think that it’s not until routines settle in place that you start to question these issues.

Then is the ingrained belief and fear people seem to have about poly=sex with anything that moves or seems to have a pulse. A belief that even if in the imagination of some, it’s never accurate if you get consent into the mix. Not to tell that someone may want to take a relationship only to a certain place or a relationship may only extend so far and after a certain point you are pushing beyond what is useful.

But honesty, even with ourselves takes intention. Even if this means to admit you like the person you are building a part of your life, but there are aspects of others who add as well.

I wish to have this conversations would be easier. I usually think about the couple of times I travelled to Europe to ride my bike with a German friend. I assure you if you are not into riding you would not like that trip I don’t care how many croissants they gave you for breakfast!

I don’t think that travel on your own will make you a lesser partner.

I also suspect that a person can connect with others in ways he/she cannot connect with someone else.

I often think, I created a family with my wife, but what if one day I create a book or a different kind of story with a different human being?

A couple of years ago I got the opportunity to hung out again with a travel partner from the past (20 years ago, I’m old!!!), and to have had that friendship then was amazing and invigorating. As it was to be able to spend the day with her 15–20 years later.

My wife knew I would visit her on that particular trip. And even when nothing happened 20 years ago nor 2 years ago, there was this strong emotional connection that to this day I am not sure what it means other than the joy of being with a kindred soul.

I feel I digressed greatly!

I feel that each one of us is like a portal, and I want to see what is on the other side.

It’s sad in a way that fear arises from the fear of losing an exclusivity we never had since we all connect in multiple ways in different ways. A strong connection is a strong connection regardless if you get in bed with someone or not. A weak connection will be a weak connection even if you get in bed or not.

And I wonder if the strength of the connection is based in intention.

Thank you as always for listening to my rant and my ideas.

Pablo